There are many studies that document the relationship between stress and disease. He didn’t do anything wrong, until, I “deemed it so”. I was the one who had developed the problem. I was the one who developed the stress leading to a cold. I was the one being childish, judgmental. My Anger, Resentment, Stress, etc., was gone. And my cold was almost gone in two days. I was lucky I just got a cold…. I received immediate relief. Took some over-the-counter meds. I came down with he worst cold in years.Īfter a week, I went to him and apologized. I had trouble sleeping and became listless in a few days. Guess What? After a week I started feeling ill. I became so angry that I thought of him and his childishness incessantly. Also, I had been the one to set up games, invited others to join us, made tee times, keep score, etc. He stopped talking to me. Remember, it was OK when I lost every week. One Sunday, he informed me he would not play in any game I was in, “He couldn’t compete”. I became angry, sent an email eviscerating him and cc’d others, which infuriated him.

It was OK, when he won for years, but when I won for a week or so, not so fun.

Recently, he lost $1 on Saturday, and $9 on Sunday. I won a few dollars. He is a successful business owner and he HATES to lose, throws his clubs, and pouts. Our handicaps frozen during the fall and winter. One of my playing partners was a 10 handicap player. I practiced with a broom or club 7 days a week, bought new irons, practiced on the range and practice area as often as possible. My handicap topped off at 28. I was down maybe $300 and I started taking lessons. We changed the format to skins (slightly easier way of betting on the game) and the maximum one could lose was $9.

We play for small stakes, so the most one of us could lose was $30-40. You play golf, so you understand the setting. I will make this brief. When I reached my 80’s, handicap kept going up. This is a story from a colleague of mine, who I greatly respect and consider a mentor. What is fascinating is that it really is just a game. I think the bonding is a result of such deeply shared suffering. For those of you who are golfers, you know that golf is a great metaphor for life.

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